Crazy, Cracked, Warm, and Deep (Paperback)
"When I was dealing with cancer, I wrote to wrestle with the gods about fairness. When I was dealing with nightmares and memories, I used prose to share the pain that was trapped in my cells. When I am holding a space in a circle for peoples' stories that are not mine to share, I write to find my heart, clear my mind, so I can stay present and connect with their world, not stay stuck in mine."
So says Susan Clarke in this sensitive and moving memoir about her commitment to herself to find a way through and out of an internal prison built by the aftermath of severe childhood trauma. While each brick was placed by a part of her with the goal of keeping her safe in an unpredictable world, the separation was so deeply at odds with Susan's genuine caring and natural need for connection to herself and others that the walls themselves became untenable pain points, leading to more walls and a labyrinth. With a seemingly indomitable will, and against all reasonable odds, Susan's journey is not just to physical health, but to a place of wholeness and inclusion that makes room for everything, full-on living without borders or walls.
Crazy, Cracked, Warm, and Deep is a stirring history, tenderly told. It is also a primer on how to locate and remember the broken and separated parts in each of us, clearing the pain "so the dark spots get the needed light to live forward." In an age of growing societal estrangement and distrust, Crazy, Cracked, Warm, and Deep lights a path for a way forward, not only to our true selves but also to our community connection.
"Choose to live. Choose to be curious. Fearlessly or fearfully face whatever is in front of you. Do not step away from chaos, conflict, and uncertainty. Instead, step in and reap the magic and the miracles."
- Susan B. Clarke